Movie Madness Monday


Welcome to the first installment of my new weekly Movie Madness Monday!  (I almost forgot I was doing this… >_>)

Working for a movie rental chain means I get to watch movies the weekend before they’re released on DVD on Tuesdays.  I must say that I’m not in the habit of watching movies.  I tend to be doing other things… for instance, my best friend was married this past weekend, so I was a little busy and didn’t get all the pre-streets watched.

The ones I did squeeze in:

  1. Skin Trade, featuring Dolph Lundgren, Tony Jaa, Ron Perlman, Michael Jai White, and Peter Weller.  Obviously, I watched this because of all those actors.  It was an okay movie.  I’d say I was entertained.  I felt that they watered down Tony Jai’s fighting style quite a bit.  Not sure if that’s because he was going up against someone the size of Dolph or not… but yeah.  I’ll give it 3/5 stars.
  2. Big Game, featuring Samuel L. Jackson and a bunch of other people that no one knows their names.  It’s one of our bigger titles and seemed more interesting than the others… at least to the Beau.  President of the USA gets shot down over Finland and is being hunted for sport while a young boy who has to spend 24 hours in the wild to prove he’s a man helps save the day.  This was another okay movie.  Kinda had a bit of a Homeward Bound feel to it… like it’s meant for pre-teens or something.  There’s some action and explosions and guns and Sammy L. Jackson.  Not too bad.  Another 3/5 stars.
  3. Plague, featuring no one.  Really.  It’s another zombie movie.  I couldn’t pay attention.  Low budget, bad acting.  We didn’t finish it.  I was tired.  The Beau was tired.  We gave up.  Don’t bother with this one unless it ends up on Netflix and you literally have nothing else to watch.  In fact, go re-watch Fido or Evil Dead.  Or check out my next list for some not-so-new releases for suggestions.  Plague gets 1/5 stars. Can I give 0 stars?  This is probably a 0/5 stars.

Now for some better movie suggestions since this list kinda sucks:

  1. Ex Machina.  Didn’t recognize any other actors in it.  That was perfectly fine.  This movie was done by the guys that did 28 Days Later.  That’s the only reason I grabbed it.  That and robots.  You know me and science fiction.  This movie is like watching three people play chess without actually seeing the chess board.  The ending was absolutely perfect.  OMG.  Spend the money and rent this movie.  Or just buy it.  WORTH IT!  5/5 stars.
  2. The Kingsmen, Secret Service.  This has Colin Firth in his first ever action movie.  I looked up the trivia.  He wanted this role.  He trained for it.  And did 80% of his own stunts in this movie.  If you’ve seen… remember that church scene?!  One take.  The fucking shot that entire scene in one take.  Woah.  And then there’s Samuel L. Jackson with a lisp.  This movie is a perfect balance of action, snark, serious stuff, and really just everything.  It was balanced and the ending is just… mind blowing… 5/5 stars.

Oh, and a movie that really pissed me off: Maggie, starring the Arnold and Abigail Breslin.  FINALLY ARNOLD IS IN A ZOMBIE MOVIE! I was so excited to watch this movie.  It’s not an action movie.  At all.  It’s more about the family aspects of the zombie apocalypse.  What would you do if your daughter became infected?  There is really only one ending… the question is the method… It’s definitely more of the touchy feely, omg emotions side of the end of the world.  I mean, I suppose it did a great job at showing that but I wanted to see Arnold slaying.  It didn’t happen.  A couple zombies here and there but yeah… And this movie was a goddamn tease.  You think it’s finally getting somewhere, that something is finally going to happen… and……..

Have you seen any of these movies?  What did you think?  Leave a comment below, send me a tweet @Owl8bit, or a message on Tumblr!


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